Monday, April 18, 2016

Monthly breather: March of Confusion

Hello loves!
A little late with my monthly breather, but right now I actually do have a moment for a breather, so better late than never ;)

 If there is one word that could sum up my feelings in March it would be confusion.
Coming back from Asia after over half a year I found myself being in that awkward state where seemingly not much has changed at home, but at the same time a lot has changed.

I was confused about finding my own daily rhythm.
I was confused about work.
I was confused about my future. ( Actually I think this is something I will always be confused about..)

And eventhough I was not expecting a completely new perspective of home, that's exactly what I got: little mini revolutions in daily life, that sometimes gave me the feeling of being someone still living in the past. That feeling of people moving on while I was still the same Me six months ago was filling me with excitement and curiosity when looking at the future, but also the fear of being left behind.

But I changed as well.

Homesickness while being at home was truly a very new experience, I was missing the amazing people I met during my time in China, the feeling of the truly truly rushing city, the mentality and just the feeling of finally belonging somewhere. It's weird because all of these things I have here at home as well. What I heard about experiences other friends made when they studied a year abroad was that the worst part about coming "home" again is the slump of emptiness you will fall right in and now I really do understand what that means.

I am always scared of new beginnings and in March I was picking up my passion for dancing again. If there is be something that makes me jump out of bed in the morning, it would be the latest dance class, these are the moments during the week where I can just forget about the long hours of working and dissatisfactions of everyday life. And although I have plenty to improve again, I still love every second of it.

Closing this monthly breather, March is the beginning of spring and with that I look forward to new exciting memories.

Currently, I'm working on my next Styling Story and I am never sure if this kind of stuff is interesting to read about, but since this blog also has its function of sort of a little diary, I guess it's fine.  And if you have come so far reading this, I really appreciate it!!

What do you look forward to in spring?

Have a nice week!!


  1. Oooh, what kind of dance do you do? I have tried so many forms because it is my favorite way to exercise and I feel so wonderful doing it. Anyway though, I think we all go through confusion at some point. I am often confused about my future because I love to plan but things don't always go according to plan... I could write a book about it, but I won't. Anyway, I hope April is wonderful to you.

    1. Modern Jazz and just started Hip Hop not too long ago :) I agree, it's so much fun and time just flies by!! Which dance is your favourite so far?

      Thank you, hope you have an amazing month as well.

  2. I can understand your confusion, I felt the same way when I came back after living in the UK for half a year. I was only 15 when I went abroad so this time completely changed my life and in a way I came back as a different person. Being back home I felt nothing had changed although that wasn't completely true - but as I was the only one of my friendship group who had gone abroad I had somehow changed more than the others and I found it hard to get back into the routine. What really helps is doing exciting stuff at home, like your dance lessons for example. Anyway, I'm moving back to the UK this year so I'm probably the wrong person to give advice haha. xx